2008's Best Commercial: T-Mobile ft. Wade and Barkley

TIME Magazine has chosen the following T-Mobile commercial featuring Dwayne Wade and Charles Barkley as the best of 2008. Sweet!  

BTW, don't be fooled by how good Chuck comes off here. He is undoubtedly still a dumbass.

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NBA Top Plays of November

Thoughts?

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Sean Avery Suspended for Being Hilarious

Sean Avery, star defensemen of the Dallas Stars, has been indefinitely suspended for his remarks regarding his "sloppy seconds." Before we go any further, please please please watch his remarks. Thank you

Crass? Yes.
Crude? Yes.
Hilarious?? Yes!

But isn't an indefinite suspension a bit much? Now, before we go any futher, I'm sure you would like to know who the sloppy seconds are, and just who is taking them. So, please please please read further.

Avery is referencing his ex-girlfriend Elisha Cuthbert. She happens to be currently dating Dion Phaneuf of the Calgary Flame. Who is Elisha Cuthbert? She is:
While dating Sean Avery she looked like this (pictured with Avery):

And now, while dating Dion Phaneuf, she looks like this (pictured with Phaneuf):

It turns out that before dating Avery, Ms. Cuthbert had a relationship with Montreal Candian's defenseman Mike Komisarek. So, in fact Avery was the first one to get his hands dirty with "sloppy seconds".

Anyhow, the fact that this is the NHL of all leagues to put down this punishment is absurd. For those that have forgotten, the NHL is the league where you get to punch each other whilst taking the other person's shirt off and rolling around in the ice. It's also the league where sticks get to hit sticks no matter what size, but you can't hit someone's body with your stick (especially in the face), nor shove it up their butts. Wait, where was I... I completely got lost in making gross insinuations.

The point is, the NHL is the joke of the big North American sports leagues and it's none other than the management's fault for mismanaging operations.

The NHL even has something called the Sean Avery rule. Via Wikipedia:

Avery used a controversial tactic to screen the opposing goaltender. While essentially ignoring the play on the ice when his team had a two-man advantage, Avery faced Martin Brodeur and waved his hands and stick in front of Brodeur in an attempt to distract him and block his view. Although not illegal, many NHL commentators and players described Avery's actions as unsportsmanlike. The following day, the NHL issued an interpretation of the league's unsportsmanlike conduct rule to cover actions such as the one employed by Avery

See the play here:


Is what Avery did really unsportsmanlike there? The stick waving is a bit much, but when I see him screening the view of the goalie all I think about is a defender guarding the inbounder in basketball. Why shouldn't offensive players be allowed to obstruct a goalie's view??

And if there are still any Celtics fan-atics here from the KG post what Avery did is not like what KG did to Calderon. KG was blatantly taunting. Avery was still focused on scoring a goal.

All of these little punishments seem ironic because the NHL is so lax about fighting. Why I ask? Most likely, it is because half of the commercial appeal (to fans) is tied up in the fights amongst players. If the NHL would only realize that characters like Avery actually bring fans in, maybe they wouldn't hate him so much.

Avery is a pest, indeed. But he isn't the same breed as Ron Artest, or Pac-Man Jones. (Not being racist, I promise). He comes off a little smarter, and funnier. Kind of like Ocho Cinco. Avery is the bad guy you enjoy watching, but would probably hate interacting with.

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Plaxico Burress is in deep DOO-DOO

Plaxico Burress did the right thing and turned himself in. He didn't have a permit to carry a loaded gun in New York and there really was no way for him to get out of it, with such a media circus covering the whole thing. It's rather admirable of him, knowing that he could get 3.5 years of jail time for this silly matter.

Mayor Michael Bloomberg:

Our children are getting killed with guns in the streets. Our police officers are getting killed with guns in the hands of criminals, and because of that, we got the State Legislature to pass a law that if you carry a loaded handgun, you get automatically 3 ½ years in the slammer.

I don’t think that anybody should be exempt from that, and I think it would be an outrage if we didn’t prosecute to the fullest extent of the law, particularly people who live in the public domain, make their living because of their visibility; they are the role models for our kids.

I knew that Bloomberg was tough on crime in New York, but didn't realize he was this tough. I applaud his fearlessness, in the face of fervent Giant fans. It's going to be rather embarassing for Bloomberg if Plaxico doesn't get 3.5 years after such a definitive statement. Yet, something inside of me (disclaimer: I have no legal experience whatsoever) says that he will end up with a much more manageable sentence.

Mikey it seems, shouldn't have been so harsh with his words:

In New York, according to state law, a person carrying a gun without a permit faces at least 3 ½ years in prison if prosecutors prove that the person intended to use the weapon on another person. If intent to use cannot be proved, the person may still face felony charges that could result in up to seven years in prison.

In my opinion it would be tough to prove that a person of Burress's stature really intended to use the weapon on another person. It doesn't help that he shot himself. But, we really have no idea what happened. Burress could have been in the process of using the gun on someone else, but shot himself instead, because he is a dumbass. We'll see how this all plays out.

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Lebron calls Barkley stupid. It's about time!

Lebron James recently responded to Charles Barkley's criticism by saying (and I quote, hence the little indentation that means a quote):

He’s stupid. That’s all I’ve got to say about that

This is a really big deal for me. Why? It's not because I think Sir Charles was out of line in telling Lebron James to "shut the hell up". On the contrary, I agree with super blogger David P. that LBJ needs to tone down his sexual yearning for NY. It's just too much right now. It's too much, and too early (have you seen the Cav's record this year?).

It's a big deal because doggone-it Charles Barkley is stupid. I've been wanting to preach this to the whole world for so long. Now at least we have all the Lebron fans on our side. The only time I like Charles is in those t-mobile commercials. He's not bad when he has a script and gets multiple takes. But, on TNT he's just incomprehensible. I'm sick of trying so hard to understand what he's trying to say. And then once I do get what he said, I realize it wasn't worth the effort!

Also, does anyone get the feeling that this year's Lebron is a completely different Lebron. There's this swagger about him now. I feel as though this is what the real Lebron has been like for years, but his publicist kept him under wraps. I really appreciate the fact that he's showing us his true character. But, now that we really know him, isn't he sort of lame? Take Barkley's advice to heart Lebron, knowing that non-stupid people feel the exact same way.

"..shut the hell up"

Here are some interesting Charles Barkley quotes I found from this site.

“We don't need refs, but I guess white guys need something to do.”

“My initial response was to sue her for defamation of character, but then I realized that I had no character.”

“If somebody hits you with an object you should beat the hell out of them.”

“The main thing to do is relax and let your talent do the work.”

Update (courtesy of reader H.R.): Charles Barkley reminds us that he is a dumbass

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Plaxico Burress Shoots Himself In The Leg

What's more stupid than tearing your ACL while celebrating a made field goal? Let's ask ex-Cardinal's kicker Bill Grammatica. Or we can ask newfound idiot Plaxico Burress who recently spent the night at the hospital after shooting himself in the leg.

The Giants said the shooting happened Friday night and he was released from the hospital early Saturday. The team did not say which hospital Burress went to or how badly he was injured.

However, a team official told The Associated Press that Burress shot himself in a nightclub. The official spoke on condition of anonymity because the team was still trying to sort out all the facts.
-via Yahoo Sports

Can someone please explain to me what the heck he was doing bringing a gun to a nightclub in the first place? This is beyond retarded. I can completely imagine him grinding up against a girl, and then she's like oh my Plaxico, you have such big black feet. And then she goes in for a little action and whoops that's not a Ball Park frank. Bam! He just got shot in the thigh.

What is it with athletes and coming to clubs packed?? I thought people go to clubs to get drunk and get action. I wouldn't want myself holding a gun if I was drunk. We need to get commentary from Stephen Jackson this instant. At least S-Jax was at a strip club.

I really want to know how this happened. Because I see two scenarios here.
Scenario #1: he is holding the gun and accidentally shoots himself in the thigh.
Scenario #2: The gun is in his pocket and somehow (grinding on a girl like discussed before, or maybe when scratching his balls) the gun goes off.

In both scenarios Plaxico is a dumbass. He catch. He dumbass.

Let's just hope this didn't happen to him:
I hope this story helps take guns off the streets. I'm tired of losing fantasy points to guns.

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New York, New York, All About New York

Lebron James heads into Madison Garden today to play the New York Knicks. Before moving on, let’s get one issue straightened out: Lebron James still plays for the Cleveland Cavaliers.

The former #1 pick is arguably the most dominant force in basketball, both on and off the court, but he is clearly lacking in the professionalism department. Lebron James was born in Akron, Ohio, played high-school basketball in Akron, Ohio, and now plays professional basketball in Cleveland, Ohio. His entire life was spent in Ohio and yet, the only time he ever dawns a piece of Ohio gear is on the court. I understand that Ohio is not the greatest place to be a professional sports fan (Browns, Cavs, Indians), but to go out to various professional venues wearing New York hats is just a slap to the face for the people of Ohio. Sure, Lebron has maintained professionalism throughout his career by being an effective role model for the league and maintaining an immaculate track record off the court, but he is displaying complete and utter disrespect for the team and city that is paying him.

Basketball is a business and James is merely a part of their short-term business models. With Lebron on the roster, the Cleveland Cavaliers receive significant sales in jerseys and other merchandise, a superstar who is capable of winning games and national television time, and ticket sales from fans that want to see their hometown team win.

Unfortunately for the Cavaliers franchise, Lebron James attends Cleveland Brown games on the opposition’s side wearing a NY hat, goes to Cleveland Indian games wearing NY hat, and hangs out with Jay-Z, part owner of the New Jersey Nets, religiously. And today, after previously wearing NY Yankee inspired shoes against the Knicks, Lebron wore his new kicks, the Nike Zoom Lebron VI "Big Apple" edition, directly inspired by his love and adoration for New York.

I am not trying to say that Lebron owes any of his success to the people of Ohio, but he definitely needs to show Ohio some respect. He can say what he wants about winning and how he loves his hometown, but if he’s continuously dissing his state on nationally televised games by wearing NY apparel, it shows where his current and future priorities lie.

Lebron, you’re a great player, but come on. This is way too much. You are a superstar and everyone expects you to have superstar friends, but the hats have got to go. Show some class and love for your hometown.

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Tie? Isn't That the Thing You Wear with a Suit?

Oh Donovan, don't be upset your team didn't win. Look at it this way, you didn't lose either. And hey, next time, brush up on the basic rules of the NFL.

I agree the NFL's overtime policy isn't all that fair (60 something percent of teams who win the cointoss win the game), but is it really all that difficult for players to know the rules at least?

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Steve Nash Shouldn't Fight

In the desert of Arizona, the Houston Rockets challenged the Phoenix Suns to a battle of athletic competition. By the third quarter, the Rockets held a commanding lead and the Suns were not happy. Watch what happens.

After listening to the complete bias of the Rocket announcers, you would automatically believe that Matt Barnes was at complete fault. Wrong. During the game, Steve Nash was the victim of questionable screens set by the Rocket players (not shown). Matt Barnes, being the noble teammate that he is, decided to retaliate against the Rockets' smallest player, Rafer Alston. And I for one, loved it (Rafer Alston is a punk)

However, the point of this article was not to correct the obvious bias of the Rocket TV announcers, but to point out Steve Nash's inability to fight. After Alston bodied Barnes for the hard foul, Steve Nash ran in and basically threw himself to the ground. If you're heated and pissed off enough to throw a punch, do it. If I was Nash, I would be ashamed. That was the most pathetic showing in a fight since Jeff Van Gundy and at least he had an excuse, he was 5'9".

Other things to note:

• Shaquille O'Neal is a beast. From a stand still he pushed down Tracy McGrady and arm barred Yao Ming to the ground.
• Matt Barnes threw the most blatant foul at Rafer Alston, but the referees did not blow the whistle. The referees did a good job of stopping the fight, but their huge non-call started all of it.
• I wonder what Steve Nash said for T-mac to react so quickly.
• What was Rafer Alston hoping to accomplish by grabbing onto to Steve Nash's arm.
• Hypothetically, if Shaq was the only one of the floor, would he be able to beat-up Yao, Scola, T-mac, Brooks, and Alston by himself? I say, "Yes."

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The Lakers' Comic Relief

Because we probably needed a good laugh after three quarters of trailing Dallas
And because we love The Machine here at AtA

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Does Anyone Remember When KG Was Respectable?

I sure can't. This recent incident with Jose Calderon just reaffirms how much of a douchebag Kevin Garnett really is. I'll be honest in saying that I have a clear bias ( huge Laker fan ) but truly that is irrelevant in this case. The Lakers have been bitter rivals with the Spurs for who knows how long, yet I still believe Tim Duncan is one of the greatest and most admirable players in the league.

Here's the video of Kevin Garnett being Kevin Garnett.

For those of you who've forgotten what type of person KG really is click the link for more:

In 2004 Kevin Garnett punched his rookie teammate Rick Rickert.

Garnett punched Rick Rickert, a second-round draft pick of the Timberwolves last season, according to several sources with knowledge of the event. Seven stitches were required to close the cut on Rickert's chin, said Susan Rickert, the player's mother, during a phone interview yesterday.

Garnett's agent and a Timberwolves spokesman declined to comment.

According to a report in the St. Paul Pioneer Press, Garnett's attack was unprovoked.

Rickert, 21, scored several times with the 6-foot-11 Garnett guarding him. Several other players began to "tease" Garnett about being outplayed, according to a source. When Rickert scored again, Garnett struck him without warning.
- Washington Post

In 2000 Kevin Garnett punched Wally Sczerbiak in the head

The dislike between the two players has been played up ever since Garnett punched an unsuspecting Szczerbiak in the locker room after practice a few years ago.

Tim Duncan stands up for Tony Parker. Kevin Garnett cusses him out. TD responds with "You're tripping man."

In the best-known example of his newfound forcefulness, Duncan got into a face-to-face smack-talking session with Minnesota's Kevin Garnett--an accomplished talker of smack, mind you--during a game in February. The Spurs were blowing out the Timberwolves, and after Garnett had given an extra shove to Spurs rookie point guard Tony Parker, Duncan began jawing with Garnett. Both were hit with technical fouls, and when the argument simmered, both were ejected. It was the first ejection of Duncan's career.

From the outside, it looked as if Duncan had earned a draw in his lip-wagging battle with Garnett. But while Garnett was getting his ejection's worth, spewing a stream of language so polluted that even Greenpeace would not bother with a cleanup effort, the best Duncan could come up with was to inform Garnett, "You're tripping, man." It was such an even-keeled response that the league office later rescinded the ejection and the $1,000 fine.
- The Sporting News

Another video of Kevin Garnett harassing Jose Calderon:



Say what you will about his intensity and passion for the game. Taunting might pass as a mere side effect of his emotion for the game, but punching a teammate is completely inexcusable (regardless of what was done to provoke it. And in the rookie's case this was apparently nothing). And it's all the more ironic because Garnett is constantly being deemed one of the greatest teammates to have.

Why is it that the traditional media seems to ignore all of this? It's as if Garnett has somehow been molded into the paragon of the NBA. A disgraceful paragon indeed.

Latrell Spreewell's coach choking or Kevin Garnett's teammate clocking? The two incidents are right on par with each other if you ask me.

One more thing: is KG not a complete psycho?

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Where'd The Pac-10 Go?

Boy, I was little b*tch in high school. Show me a pretty girl who was willing to talk to me, and you could've stuck a fork in me right there. I fell hard and fast. So I guess that would make the Pacific-10 conference the little bitch conference of college football, right? After Week 1, the Pac-10 was perceived to be one of the elite conferences in football. It boasted four teams in the Associated Press top 25, including UCLA at #23, Oregon at #18, Arizona State at #16, and of course USC bearing the torch at #1. And like dominoes, the ranked reps of the Pac-10 would fall one by one, week by week.

After Week 2, UCLA had fallen off, with Cal taking its place. In Week 3, Cal and Arizona State would both stumble, leaving Oregon and USC as the only ranked Pac-10 teams. By Week 4, Oregon would fall as well, leaving USC all alone to guard the top spot against 24 non-conference teams. And almost fittingly, USC would lose in Week 5 to Oregon State, thus eliminating the only remaining reason to consider the Pac-10 a respectable conference.

As the Pac-10 spiraled down the drain, the already dominant SEC and Big 12 conferences would grow stronger, as Alabama, Texas Tech, and Oklahoma State would all rise from the unknown into national championship contention. Even the perennial laughing stock of college football, known to many as the Big 10 conference, would begin to turn heads with the consistent dominance of Penn State and the emergence of Michigan State. To get an idea of just how dominant the SEC and Big 12 have become, just look at the Week 10 BCS standings. SEC and Big 12 teams are currently occupying six of the top 10 spots.

Some might see the sudden collapse of the Pac-10 conference as surprising, inexplicable even. I do not. When I look at the top 10 BCS teams, or any team that ever had a shot at the national title game for that matter, I see something that all Pac-10 teams (even USC) lack: Heisman-caliber talent (the exceptions being Alabama and Penn State, who have survived all season because of their defense and coach, causing me to question their legitimacy as contenders). Let us browse the list of current and former contenders.

Current Contenders

• Texas Tech - Graham Harrell has long been one of the most prolific passers in college football. And with Tech's upset win over Texas last week, Harrell and Crabtree have both convinced us that they are among the best in their respective positions.

• Texas - Vince Young mourners can dry their eyes. Colt McCoy. Enough said. Childhood buddy Jordan Shipley aint too shabby either.

• Florida - The numbers haven't quite been there for Tim Tebow and Percy Harvin, but don't tell me your bones still don't tremble every time they lace up their cleats.

• Oklahoma - Much like Harrell's, Sam Bradford's numbers are absolutely outrageous. And he's been putting them up against much stronger opponents.

Former Contenders

• Georgia - I overheard ESPN anchors touting Matthew Stafford has the most talented NFL-caliber quarterback. I'm not sure I'd agree, but I guess that's why they're in the studio, broadcasting to millions while I'm sitting in bed writing this article and watching Gossip Girl. Knowshon Moreno, however, has not disappointed.

• Missouri - When a team has not one, but two Heisman talents, they're usually a lock for title contention. Unfortunately, not even the combined efforts of Chase Daniel and Jeremy Maclin have been able to compensate for Mizzou's horrendous defense.

In terms of talent, the Pac-10 can hardly compete with that of the aforementioned. Cal running back is just a sophomore, and will certainly contend for the Heisman next year. If Oregon State had simply discovered the explosive talent of true freshman Jacquizz Rodgers a few games earlier, they could easily be a ranked team right now. Other than those two, who do we have? Mark Sanchez? After Ohio State, sure. But since then, not even close. If the Pac-10 wishes to return to the prominence it enjoyed as recently as last year, the solution is simple: recruit some god damn talent (though I know this is much easier said than done).

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What's Up With the NFL? A Team-by-Team Look

Brian Chen: Is it just me, or is football especially out of control this year?
Me: It is.
Brian Chen: Just making sure.
Me: I could make a list that goes on and on with what's wrong with the NFL this season.
Brian Chen: Damn. Please do. That's a genius ATA article.

And thus an article is born. Here's a team-by-team breakdown of why the NFL isn't quite right this year.

Kansas City Chiefs: Larry Johnson (see right). LJ, one of the few superstars who seems to have averted the injury bug this year, can't keep his ass on the field because he can't seem to stop picking fights and throwing drinks in chicks' faces. But that's cool, you never back down from a fight, right LJ?

San Fransisco 49ers: So they finally admitted Alex Smith is a bust. Not only was he outperformed by Shaun Hill and J.T. O'Sullivan, but he's also on IR. I thought they were going to ride him out until no team would ever dream of signing him (like poor David Carr). Mike Nolan was the first NFL head coach to bite the bullet this season, and already his replacement Mike Singletary is already making waves by dropping his pants at halftime and sending a potential bust draft pick of Vernon Davis to the locker room early.

Chicago Bears: Grossman? Orton? They've been flipping coins the past years to decide who the starter is. This year Orton won the toss, and guess what? He's actually good. Too bad it looks like he may be out for a while after getting carted off the field in this weeks' game. That is, unless he makes a miracle comeback (word to Paul Pierce).

Cincinnati Bengals: The only thing worse than their disappointing record (and disappointing is an understatement here) is that Chad Ocho Cinco has to wear a fake last name on the back of his jersey. Is this the NFL or the XFL?

Buffalo Bills: After being thrown into the mediocrity pile, Lee Evans is now the third highest-paid WR in the NFL, and he's putting up numbers to show it. Oh and the Bills aren't too shabby either, no longer the coat rack of the AFC East (assuming the Dolphins are its doormat). Bills tied for first.

Denver Broncos: Hi, my name is Jay Cutler. I was so bad that they made fun of me on an episode of South Park. But I'm better this year. In fact, I throw better than John Elway. Alright Jay, let's take a step back for a second. Ok, so you lost a lot of weight, fighting diabetes can do that for you. And yes, you're playing better, throwing up monster numbers, winning games through pure offense, since everyone knows how squishy your defense is. But John Elway? That's like Jordan Farmar saying he passes better than Magic Johnson. Maybe 7 years into the future if you're still putting up obscene numbers and have won some rings, you can claim that. For now, Peter Rabbit would be wise to stay out of Mr. McGregor's garden.

Cleveland Browns: A trendy pick for many to breakout this season, they now have a bigger problem than making the playoffs: preventing more staph infections. Seriously guys, you're an NFL franchise. You can afford to clean up a little more thoroughly.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Pushing for an NFC South title, and almost lost to Kansas City. That's all I have to say.

Arizona Cardinals: Kurt Warner must have gotten his hands on some sort of NFL-viagra, because he sure seems to be getting it up this season. Third in the league in passer rating, and second in passing yards. Matt who?

San Diego Chargers: So much for Super Bowl bound. Let's get to .500, then we'll talk.

Indianapolis Colts: A perennial lock to win the AFC South, the Colts will have to fight for a wild-card birth. Unless Tennessee drops 5 of the last 8.

Dallas Cowboys: Life without Tony? The Cowboys are a lot like Jessica Simpson: without Tony Romo both would just be sad, lost little puppies. Thank God Romo is coming back soon and Jess is talking marriage.

Miami Dolphins: They're .500. The bad news: they're still in last place in their divison. And they actually have a quarterback. Movin' on up like George and Wheezy.

Philadelphia Eagles: 5-3 and they're in third place in their division. There's something wrong with that. If Westbrook had stayed healthy, there would have been something wrong with that too.

Atlanta Falcons: 5-3 and they're in third place in their division. Wait, I just said that. Two years removed from the Michael Vick circus, they look like they have their quarterback of the future in Matt Ryan. Surprising they have a winning record at this point in the season, no?

New York Giants: The defending NFL champions have one blemish on their season, a loss to the lowly Browns. Forget the almost boo boo against the Bengals, a W is still a W last time I checked.

Jacksonville Jaguars: A team that many, myself included, believed to be ready to snatch away the AFC South title from the Colts is tied for last with who? The Texans.

New York Jets: Brett Favre, as ancient as he is, can still throw. Problem is his offense isn't tailored around him. Favre leading the NFL in interceptions thrown. Never thought I'd see that day.

Detroit Lions: After taking receivers with their top pick in 3 of the last 5 drafts, they still have no quarterback and have only one of said receivers left on their roster. The result: 0-8.

Green Bay Packers: 4-3 and gave Aaron Rodgers a huge extension. Now they're 4-4. It's far too soon to be asking "Brett who?"

Carolina Panthers: They switch between looking impressive and unimpressive. At least they're sitting pretty on top of their division.

New England Patriots: Starting a quarterback who was only a second string player throughout college and still 5-2?? I'm impressed.

Oakland Raiders: Al Davis. 'Nuff said. I'll throw in a "JaMarcus Russell sucks" plug just for Brian Chen. The highlight of their season? Outgoing Lane Kiffin making Sebastian Janikowski try a 76-yard field goal into the wind.

St. Louis Rams: Torry Holt is no longer the #1 option. I liken that to Manny Ramirez batting 7th.

Baltimore Ravens: They actually have a solid running game, AND a decent passing game. It's not just about defense anymore folks.

Washington Redskins: Jason Campbell hasn't thrown a pick all season. He's not that good. First year coach Jim Zorn is doing a hell of a job.

New Orleans Saints: This team produces enough firepower to take down a small European country's army. Defense has yet to show up. No surprises there. Being behind the Falcons and last in their division IS a surprise though.

Seattle Seahawks: 2-6 and tied for second in the NFC West. I don't know what's more wrong here, their record or the NFC West.

Pittsburgh Steelers: There is life without Willie Parker. Well, that's shocking to me.

Houston Texans: David Carr is gone?!?! Yes, they finally decided to give up. Seems they finally figured a way to get those beer goggles off.

Tennessee Titans: UNDFTD.

Minnesota Vikings: Adrian Peterson can't carry this team by himself like I thought he could. Their defense is nowhere near as good as it was being touted as before the season began.

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Boxing's New Golden Boy

For those of you who don't follow boxing or just keep up with the "big name" fighters, this video should show bring you up to speed on the face of boxing today.

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Andrew Bynum's Birthday

Maybe that's why he started off so badly against the Blazers. He was probably still drunk.

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NBA: 10 Things To Look Forward To

Finally basketball fans, the NBA season has started! On the first day, the Lakers looked dominant, Celtics won at home, Lebron lost again, and Derrick Rose is starting at point for the Bulls. Here is my list of things to look forward to this 2008-09 season:

1. The Lakers have two 7-footers in their starting lineup, Lamar leading the second squad, the deepest bench in the league, and Kobe Bryant. If they can stay healthy, I predict a 64-win season and the title.

2. Beantown just hung another banner in their historic stadium. Are the Celtics still hungry? And how will they deal with the loss of their best perimeter defender (how are they going to slow down Kobe?)?

3. Baron Davis is back in his hometown and playing for another historically bad team. Will he and Camby miraculously lead the Clippers to the playoffs?

4. The 76ers solidified their lineup with the addition of a healthy Elton Brand. Will the 76ers live up to their hype and challenge Boston for the Eastern crown?

5. There's was a reason to be excited in Portland, but he has the durability (and face) of a 55 year old man. After being manhandled in the opener versus the Lakers and losing Oden to injury, can Portland live up to the hype?

6. The Chicago Bulls looked like a huge mess during the offseason but everything came together in their first game with Derrick Rose at the helm. Can this rookie finally lead the Bulls to their full potential?

7. New York Knicks are still recovering from Isiah Thomas's past decisions. With Marbury remaining relatively quiet and Mike D'antoni as the coach, I believe we'll be pleasantly surprised this season.

8. Seattle, the most depressing city in America, no longer has an NBA franchise of their own. How will Kevin Durant and the Oklahoma City Thunder fare in the Western division. (I'm not going to be optimistic here, 16 wins.)

9. Let's face it, LeBron James does not like the Cleveland Cavaliers or the city of Cleveland. He likes Jay-Z, he likes New York and it is a contract year. How is this season going to play out in Ohio?

10. Derrick Rose, OJ Mayo, Michael Beasley, and Kevin Love are expected to make huge contributions to their respective teams. Can these NBA neophytes really make a huge difference and who will make the biggest impact and win the ROY trophy? (I still say OJ Mayo)

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Let's Talk BCS

The purpose of the BCS ranking system is to aggregately rank, from an array of statistics, the 25 best college football teams in the nation, ultimately arriving at the top two teams that will play for the national championship.

The BCS point system is computed as an average of three primary components: the Harris Interactive poll, the USA coaches poll, and a combination of six computer polls.

The Harris poll consists of 113 voters, each entitled to vote for how he or she believes the top 25 should be ranked. A #1 ranking counts for 25 points, a #2 ranking 24 points, and so on. Therefore, the total points possible for the Harris poll (113 x 25) is 2825.

So to calculate the Harris portion of the BCS formula, we take the point total accumulated from all 113 voters and divide that by the total points possible, yielding a percentange.

The USA coaches poll is calculated in the same manner. There are 62 total coaches voting, meaning the total points possible for the USA coaches poll is 1550. We divide the point total accumulated by each team, divide it by the point total, giving us a second percentage.

For the third and final portion of the BCS formula, we use six different computer polls: the Jeff Anderson-Chris Hester, the Richard Billingsley, the Wes Colley, the Kenneth Massey, the Jeff Sagarin, and the Peter Wolfe. To fully understand how each computer poll works would be absurd and unnecessary, but we do know that each poll factors, for the most part, the same statistics (strength of schedule is considered, margin of victory is not).

After all six computer polls are calculated, the highest and lowest are discarded, and the remaining four are averaged, giving us a third percentage. The Harris average, coaches average, and computer average are then averaged themselves, yielding the sacred BCS average. Now try to say that all in one breath.

In all my years as a fan, I have yet to encounter a sports institution so ridiculed and, for lack of a better way to put it, 'hated on' as the BCS ranking system. And with the history of laughable championship game results this system has produced over its years in existence, it's kind of hard to argue with the outcry.

BCS supporters probably believe the system offers a good balance between human subjectivity and mathematical objectivity. BCS critics, on the other hand, will argue that human subjectivity leaves too much room for bias, while using standardized computer polls on teams that don't even play the same opponents is inherently flawed. They will argue that instead of the BCS system, a playoff should determine who plays for the national title.

The truth is, in a sport like college football, both the BCS system and a playoff system are necessary.

The NBA, MLB, and NHL all have 30 teams. The NFL has 32 teams. These manageable numbers are easily conducive to a playoff system in determining which two teams will play for the championship. Division I college football, however, sports over 100 teams. With so many teams vying for bowl consideration, we have no choice but to implement a questionable system such as the Bowl Championship Series to determine the strength of each team relative to the rest. But while the BCS should be used as a ranking system that sets the match-ups for the playoff that should immediately follow, it is instead used as the only determinant for deciding which two teams will represent college football's best.

Here's what I don't understand. D-I NCAA basketball has hundreds of teams, and is forced to use a questionable ranking system, similar to how the Bowl Championship Series is used. But instead of allowing this arbitrary system to be the final say in whether UCLA plays Florida or Memphis plays Kansas in the finals, the powers that be of college basketball recognize the sacredness of the postseason in sports.

64 teams are forced to dance in an elimination tournament, leaving us with the two most deserving teams to contend for the title. Why can't college football adopt the same format? How many more championship blowouts must we endure before the coaches and voters realize that a playoff system is necessary in addition to the BCS?

Unfortunately for grossly overrated Alabama and Penn State, if a change is coming, it won't be coming this year. I pity these two teams because if either is granted the task of playing Texas for the national title, we will have another championship massacre on our hands. On the bright side, at least one team will be happy, finally having the overrated label lifted from them. Right Ohio State?

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Can Titans Achieve Perfection?

So here we are midway through the NFL season, a season marked with big name injuries (see Brady, Tom), off the field drama (see Johnson, Larry), coaching changes (see Kiffin, Lane), and big disappointments (see Bengals, Cincinnati). The biggest surprise thus far, however, has been the Tennessee Titans.

A team that many wrote off before the season began as the third best team in its division is now the only unbeaten team left in the NFL. But can the Titans match the Patriots feat of last season? Is this a team poised for a perfect season?

To answer these questions, we look at how the Titans got to 7-0 and also the trials that lay ahead.

Their first game of the season somewhat set the tone for the weeks to come, establishing the defense as a mainstay for a winning program. The speedy Chris Johnson also made a strong case to be the feature back, or at least take a number of carries from big, lumbering LenDale. They followed this program in the following weeks, taking down the Bengals, Texans, and Vikings by a staggering combined margin of 85-36. This, while their franchise quarterback Vince Young had been standing on the sidelines, watching an old legend, Kerry Collins, run what was supposed to be his show. With a full head of steam the Titans faced a team cut from the same mold as themselves, the Ravens. Touting a quick, aggressive defense, the Ravens fought the Titans back and forth, with both offenses having trouble fighting for yards on every drive. In the end, Kerry Collins was able to lead his team on an 80-yard drive, showing why the team has been so keen to keep him on the field and their strong, young, dynamic, expensive quarterback of the future off the field.

Coming off the bye week, the Chiefs were hardly a hinderance, and the Titans were heading into this weeks matchup against the Indianapolis Colts brimming with confidence, even faced with a team that many believed to be exponentially better than their 3-3 record. It was a game that was a statement game for both sides. The Titans on one hand had an opportunity to put themselves leaps and bounds above any other team in their division, and also to take down the perennial division leader. The Colts on the other hand, almost needed to win this game. At 3-3 they were shooting par, regardless of how good they or anyone else thinks they are. A win would also bring them a bit closer to the top of the division, a spot they were starting to be a lock for year in and year out (see Patriots, New England).

The score isn't a very accurate measure of how the game went. While the Colts' offense looked out of sync against the stifling Tennesse defense, they were still leading 14-6 with ten minutes left in the third quarter. After a Titans drive ending in a LenDale White touchdown and a 2-point conversion, Colts coach Tony Dungy made a few questionable calls on 4th down situations, and after the Titans' D stopped them short, momentum began its shift.

It seemed as if the Colts were easily going to make it downfield and score, but were faced with a short 4th down at midfield. With the score the way it was, and with over a quarter left to play, Dungy left Manning on the field (or Manning forced Dungy to leave him in), and the Colts were stopped short. After that play, the Titans went on to score 17 more unanswered points, thanks to another turnover on downs and a Manning interception. (On a side note I use this time to lobby for a change in NFL stats keeping, Dallas Clark clearly should have made that catch and had he not let the ball clunk off his head, there would have been no interception. My point: somehow credit Clark with the turnover, not Manning.) Needing three scores with less than four minutes to go, the Colts were inevitabily doomed to mediocrity for the first half of the season, and the Titans could sleep dreaming of sugar-plum fairies dancing around a 16-0 final record.

Only time will tell if the Titans can remain undefeated, but they face a daunting second-half schedule, with games against the Packers, Bears, Jaguars, Steelers, and Colts. The Pack is coming off a bye, so expect Aaron Rodgers to be throwing with a healthier arm. Chicago brings the threat of a hard-nosed defense and a cold weather game. Jacksonville looks to avenge its earlier loss with a healthy offensive line. The Steelers always play the Titans tough and hope their Pro Bowl running back Willie Parker can return sometime soon. Should the Titans remain lossless going into the final game, the Colts have a chance to play spoiler in Indianapolis. Undoubtedly they have a tough road ahead, but they have plenty of confidence and are playing the best football since Wycheck to Dyson.

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Look Who Just Released Their Inner Rockstar

Of course they get the black guy to sing. The top athletes gotta relax too I guess.

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Brett Favre's Only Weakness - Eric Mangini

Age is a meaningless number, and Brett Favre is walking proof. Down by a field goal to the Raiders with 1:07 remaining in regulation, Favre showed us just how meaningless. Pinned on his own 5-yard line on 3rd and long, Favre should have just rolled over and died. But if you know Brett Favre, you'd know that curling up in a corner has never been one of his fortes. So even at the tender age of 39, why would we expect any different from Favre?

Favre completed a huge 37-yard pass to Chansi Stuckey to escape third down. The Jets were out of timeouts, and Stuckey was unable to get out of bounds. Favre was forced to waste a down in order to stop the clock. After accepting a careless Oakland penalty, Favre found Brad Smith for a medium gain, and immediately downed the ball again the stop the clock. Raider and Jet fans alike were on the edge of their seats, apprehensive and hopeful, respectively, that this white-bearded old man could possibly have another miracle in his back packet...

26 seconds left, another 3rd down. Favre again found Brad Smith, this time for a considerable 18-yard gain. Smith, unable to get out of bounds again, forced Favre to down the football again. He had done it. The Jets were within Feely's field goal range, and Favre had given his team a chance to send the game to overtime. Feely missed the 52-yard attempt, but was given a second chance as interim Raider head coach Tom Cable had foolishly called time out in an attempt to freeze Feely. Feely nailed the second one. The score was notched at 13 apiece.

Eric Mangini was satisfied with the tie. Or that's how it seemed. On the Jets opening drive, it became clear that Mangini had abandoned the strategy that sent the game to overtime: trusting his veteran quarterback to make plays. From their own 22-yard line, Mangini called for two consecutive running plays with Thomas Jones. Mangini finally let Favre throw on third down, and Favre did his best to show Mangini the error of his ways. 17-yard completion, first down. Unfortunately, Mangini didn't get the message, and gave the ball back to Thomas Jones. The Jets eventually punted the ball away at midfield.

After holding the Raiders to a 3-and-out, the Jets got the ball back. Once again, Mangini pounded the ball on the ground with Jones on two consecutive snaps, and yielded six total yards. Brett Favre is a legend, but you can't expect him to bail you out of every third down hole you dig yourself into. This time he failed, and the Jets punted the ball back to the Raiders. But the Jets defense continued to take care of business. Another 3-and-out for the Raiders, another chance for Favre and the Jets (or should I say, Thomas Jones and the Jets). Again, two consecutive running plays, which finally yielded a first down. Then a third, resulting in a two-yard loss. On 2nd and 12, Favre was finally given the green light, but was again unable to dig his team out of the hole Mangini had dug. On the ensuing Raider drive, JaMarcus Russell would uncharacteristically complete two big passes, allowing Sebastian Janikowski to kick a miraculous 57-yard field goal to seal the game.

Even at the age of 39, Brett Favre's greatness is undeniable (when was the last time Tom Brady, Peyton Manning, or Drew Brees threw for six touchdowns in a game?). But when your own head coach is doing everything in his power to contain that greatness, there really isn't much you can do, is there?

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Just Like South Bend...

USC football players have plenty of things to worry about it. Staying on top of their assignments on the field, keeping their grades up, and maintaining good behavior off the field - these are things that a Trojan football star will tell you are his priorities. Taking care of his measly mouth guard after football games - this will likely not be on the list.

Ramon Roges is a dentist. In his 10 years as the dentist for USC athletes, one of the greatest challenges Roges has faced is getting the football players to hang onto said mouth guards. Therefore, in an attempt to psychologically increase each player's personal connection with his own mouth guard, Roges began customizing them. For example, Roges replicated the Mexican national flag when designing quarterback Mark Sanchez's red, white, and green mouth guard, even including an eagle with a snake in its grasp. Sanchez thought "it was looking sweet," and wore the mouth guard in his second official start against Notre Dame in October 2007.

After throwing for four touchdowns en route to a 38-0 victory, the Trojan quarterback would march off the field in South Bend, bathing in chants of "San-CHEZ! San-CHEZ!" Unfortunately, the post-game reception was not nearly as supportive. A good portion of the media, especially the online portion, somehow interpreted Sanchez's cultural mouth guard as an endorsement for illegal immigration. USC's football office was immediately flooded with angry letters, phone calls, and emails.

Because of this incident, Sanchez has since stopped wearing the colorful mouth guard on a regular basis. On Saturday, USC played arguably one of the worst teams in Division I college football, Washington State University. And like he has all year, Sanchez would play without the mouth guard. Sanchez was taken out of the game in the third quarter as his Trojans had built a laughable 41-0 lead at halftime. In the 30 minutes of action he did see, Sanchez missed just five passes while completing 15 for 253 yards and 5 touchdowns (keep in mind, this was all in the first half, so mathematically, that's a touchdown every three and a half minutes he was on the field). Only once during the game did Sanchez throw two consecutive incomplete passes.

What other statistics can I regurgitate to properly portray how lopsided this game was? USC accumulated 625 yards of total offense (263 yards passing, 363 yards rushing) compared to Washington State's 116 (28 yards passing, 88 yards rushing). This stat could have easily been more skewed if Pete Carroll hadn't been uncharacteristically merciful, and kept Sanchez in the game. USC had 28 first downs compared to WSU's 4. The Trojans were 8-12 on third-down conversions while the Cougars were 1-13. This was a game between the varsity and the junior varsity. No, not even junior varsity. This was a game between the varsity and the frosh-soph team. True, the red, white, and green mouth guard was not there this time. The dominance Sanchez demonstrated in South Bend, however, was.

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Crazy Moment from LSU vs. South Carolina

Tim Donaghy, meet your College Football soulmate.

LOL, what?!

He must have asked the folks at Buffalo Wild Wings if they were ready to go home or not.

On a more serious note, he should be getting his resume ready. Good luck man, it's a tough job market out there.

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A Trojan's Christmas List

With seven weeks in the books and eight to go, the USC football team is currently ranked 6 by the Associated Press and 4 by USA Today. And with a cream puff schedule left to be played, the Trojans will unfortunately have to rely on the missteps of other teams to have any hope at the title game. I know it's only October, but here are a few things I wouldn't mind Santa delivering a little earlier this year:

1) Texas loses to Missouri on Oct. 18.

After upsetting the top-ranked Sooners last week, Texas continues its minefield march this Saturday against the explosive Missouri Tigers. If Colt McCoy is able to lead his Longhorns passed the Tigers, the hard part of their journey will be over, as they will only have to contend with Oklahoma State, unproven Texas Tech, and middle-of-the-road Kansas (though we'll know what the Jayhawks are made of this weekend when they play Oklahoma, won't we?).

As it looks now, Missouri looks like our best hope to trip up the undefeated Longhorns, moving us one spot closer to the title game. And with the great Chase Daniel having been embarrassed last weekend by being picked off three times, he and his Tigers will be seeking redemption.

2) Alabama loses to LSU on Nov. 8.

Before Week 7, people were labeling LSU as the most overrated team in the top 5. I, however, will have to go with Alabama as the most overrated team in the top 5. Sure they toppled former #3 Georgia 41-30 in their matchup two weeks ago. But anyone who watched that game could easily question the legitimacy of that win.

Close to one of the worst halves of football Georgia could have played, they committed five penalities for 56 yards that resulted in Alabama scoring on all five drives (four touchdowns and a field goal) of the half. After starting their opening drive on their own 20 yard line, Alabama would never again start inside their own 35. In fact, two drives would open on Georgia's 48 and 33, as a result of a terrible punt and a Georgia fumble, respectively. Finally, Alabama quarterback John Parker Wilson was a startling deviation from his normal self, playing an almost perfect half. Wilson was 10-11 for 139 yards and a touchdown in the first half. All of these factors would contribute to Alabama building what proved to be an insurmountable 31-0 lead.

Without this win, Alabama would be just another team peering into the top 10. And if these two teams were to meet again, I highly doubt that fortune would hand the game to Bama on a silver platter the way she did three weeks ago. So fine, after getting shredded by Florida 21-51, LSU didn't deserve the hype they were getting either, but this is my Christmas list, and LSU is my best shot at beating Bama.

3) Penn State loses to Ohio State on Oct. 25.

No team in the top 5 scares me quite like Penn State. I don't understand how Joe Paterno is still able to walk, but he walks, and coaches his team to dominant victory after dominant victory. With its current ranking of 3 by both the Associated Press and USA Today, and with Ohio State (laughing out loud as I am typing) as its biggest test remaining on the schedule, Penn State is easily the team with the best chance at the title game.

I know, it's sad.

Ohio State, the #3 team to open the season, for a while couldn't even decide who to play as their quarterback. But with Pryor having started the last two games, I think it's safe to say that they have opted to go with their freshman. The replacement of Boeckman with Pryor means the added threat of a quick, mobile quarterback. Unfortunately, this also means the Ohio State passing game will take a hit. In his two starts against Wisconsin and Purdue, Pryor has averaged just 120.5 yards of passing offense, with no touchdowns.

And while Penn State has been dominating, Ohio State has been doing the exact opposite, barely squeeking by opponents. I know it's outlandish to even suggest Ohio State has a chance against Penn State, but again, this is my Christmas list, and Ohio State is my only hope...

4) Oklahoma loses to Oklahoma State on Nov. 29.

A loss last week to a strong Texas squad was not quite enough for the AP voters to rank Oklahoma beneath USC. Therefore, I will be wishing for one more loss on OU's part. With remaining games against Kansas, Texas Tech, and Oklahoma State, Oklahoma has most reason to worry about Oklahoma State. And with its impressive victory over Missouri last week, it looks like Oklahoma State will be my darkhorse to beat the Sooners in the final game of the season.

Of course, if I am granted my first three wishes, this wish won't be necessary, as a USC Oklahoma championship game will likely be the result. That and the fact that I honestly cannot see Oklahoma State being nearly as successful against Oklahoma as they were against Missouri. Oklahoma actually has a defense.

5) To get buff like Jae Pee.

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Do or Die Dodgers

Did you see Cole Hamels at the press conference last night? With his hair all nicely combed and styled? I'm not gonna lie to you, that is one good looking boy. The Dodgers have no chance.

First of all, I'd like to congratulate the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim. You guys managed to win 100 regular season games and even took a game off the defending champion Red Sox in the ALDS. You did all this with two good (at best) pitchers, and three average pitchers manning your rotation. But then again, in a season where Dustin Pedroia almost outslugs David Ortiz, I guess anything is possible.

WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT ANGELS PITCHING? But don't let my biased dislike for the Angels give you the wrong idea. The Halos easily deserved to be in the playoffs. All I'm saying is that they had no business winning 100 games, nor did they have any realistic shot at the World Series this year. In any case, the Angels are out, so let's focus our attention on a team that still matters. Now about them Dodgers...

In my relentless efforts to prove how doomed the Angels were in the postseason, I forgot to mention one thing: the Dodgers were more doomed. Easily one of the two weakest teams in the postseason, I'm not sure if the Dodgers belonged here this year. Dodger fans love making the case that the acquisition of Manny Ramirez and Casey Blake completely transformed this team. They say that Manny's presence alone has improved those around him. But let's look at this statistically. What changed, really? Matt Kemp and James Loney? They've been just as productive since Manny's arrival, no more, no less. Jeff Kent? Just as much of a non-factor since Manny's arrival as he was before. Andruw Jones? HAHAHA Andruw Jones. So fine. Andre Ethier temporarily lost his mind and slugged nine home runs during a three-week stretch, but he has since returned to normal, and hasn't hit a home run in nearly five weeks. Was Ethier simply maturing and coming into his own as a young, talented hitter? Was he inflicted with a temporary bit of amnesia and suddenly think he was Shawn Green? Whatever the reason, it probably doesn't have much to do with Manny.

So the Dodgers are sending out Chad Billingsley to face off against Cole Hamels tonight in their own do or die game. In fact, they're doing so at this very moment. Billingsley has been the Dodgers most dominant pitcher since the All-Star Break, and will try to rebound from his miserable performance in Game 2. Cole Hamels has been dominant all season, and has continued this dominance in the postseason. And when you have an offense as awesome as the Phillies offense, there really isn't much you can do but sit down on the floor and cry.

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Do or Die Angels (Died)

Boy, it's got to be frustrating if you're an Angel fan. Your ace gives you a quality start in Game 1 and you're only able to muster a single run. Your offense manages to wake up in Game 2, but your second started gets lit up. You finally muscle out a huge do-or-die Game 3 win in 12 innings in what you're hoping to the series-changer. Your ace tosses you yet another quality start in Game 4, and once again your offense isn't able to give him a decision. But your team hangs tough, and the game is tied heading into the 9th.

Your offense has been struggling all game, With GA, Vladi and Teixera all hitless. This inning doesn't look too promising either, with the bottom of the order due up. Miraculously, pinch-hitter Kendry Morales smokes a lead-off double off the green monster. You're in business. Howie Kendrick then executes a perfect sacrifice bunt, sending the pinch-runner Reggie Willits to third. Man on third with one out. Any ball put in play will likely score the go-ahead run. Then you'll be able to send out the most prolific single-season closer in MLB history to dig yourself out of what was once a 0-2 hole, suddenly making this a one-game series to be played at Angel Stadium...

Eric Aybar is at the plate. All he has to do is not strike out, put the ball in play. But Scioscia was desperate, and made a move he hoped the Red Sox were not expecting. He tried to squeeze Willits home. Unfortunately, Aybar's bunt attempt whiffed, and by the time Varitek plucked the ball out of his glove, Willits was stuck halfway between third and home. With two eyes on the back of his head, Willits did his best to scurry back to third, but Varitek chased him down and tagged him out. Suddenly, there were two outs, and the bases were empty. Aybar grounded out to end the top half of the 9th, Shields proceeded to blow the game in the bottom half, and that's the end of that story.

You can chew Scioscia out all you want for putting the entire season on one risky play. But the truth is, this was a great call. If the play had worked, the Angels may have escaped the game, the series, and we'd all be hailing Skip as a genius. So Scioscia rolled the dice. He gambled that Aybar would be able to lay the bunt down, or at least get his damn bat on the ball. If the bunt had sprayed foul, they could have easily reverted back to the original plan, getting Willits home on a sacrifice fly or ground out. Who would've guessed that a major league ball player would have whiffed on a bunt? Not you, not me, and not Mike Scioscia. There's a reason why Scioscia is a World Series champion, and the rest of us aren't. He makes the calls that the rest of us don't have the cajones to make.

Unfortunately, the dice isn't always kind. I guess you crapped out this time, Skip.

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Eli the Enigma

If you're a true sports fan, you'll agree with me. Nothing teaches you more about an athlete than having him on your fantasy team. You begin paying attention to injury reports, not just on your player, but any player on the team that may have an effect on your player. You start dragging yourself out of bed at the unholy hour of 10am on Sunday mornings to watch your player, praying he scores a touchdown in a game you otherwise wouldn't give a rat's ass about.

With our sports blog about to launch last year, I realized that I'd be a shameful sports writer/blogger knowing as little as I did about the NFL. I decided to venture outside the NBA and MLB bubble that had kept me so warm and cozy for the past decade, and draft my first fantasy football team. In retrospect, my rookie draft could not have turned out worse. My first round pick, Steven Jackson, was hobbled by injury all season (although I am comforted by the fact that every first round pick except LT, Romo, and Brady last year turned out to be busts). I went with aging legend Torry Holt over stars Reggie Wayne, Larry Fitzgerald, and Andre Johnson. I went with one-year wonder Marc Bulger as my starting quarterback. By the way, the answer is: no, I didn't realize until after the draft that I had chosen three St. Louis Rams. My biggest mistake, however, even if it was in the 12th round, was drafting the underachieving headache that was Eli Manning...

I studied his career stats. Average yardage numbers, average touchdown to interception ratios, average accuracy numbers. Everything was average and by no means impressive. I looked into his college numbers at Ole Miss to gauge his potential upside. Slightly better yardage numbers, slightly better touchdown to interception ratios, and the same unimpressive accuracy numbers. So adjusted for college statistical inflation, I was most likely looking at the best that Eli Manning had to offer...

With Bulger as my first quarterback, I obviously gave him the nod over Eli in Week 1. As I watched Bulger struggle to produce just 167 yards and one touchdown pass, insult was added to injury as Eli rolled his way to 312 yards and four touchdown passes, on my bench. I immediately benched Bulger and inserted Eli into my lineup for Week 2, and what do you know? Bulger puts up a monster game in Week 2. At this point, I had a decision to make, and I decided to stick with Eli. For the remainder of the season, Eli would struggle with mediocre numbers and inconsistency. In fact, if it weren't for Ronnie Brown's early season heroics, my team would have floundered. By Week 10, I had grown sick and tired of Bulger's health issues and Eli's mediocrity. Luckily for me, I happened to stumble upon a pretty little gem on waivers named Kurt Warner, who would go on to put up monster numbers for me down the stretch.

With Eli as my quarterback for the first half of last season, I developed an awkward obsession with him. While most people develop loyal, affectionate inclinations toward their fantasy players, my relationship with Eli was one of animosity. Whenever a Giants game was broadcasted, I would watch, rooting for Eli to play poorly, which he often did. I did this partly because I wanted to make sure I did the right thing in cutting him loose, and partly just because I hated Eli Manning. One thing that stood out most when watching Giant's games was that kiddish expression that, more often than not, would be plastered across Eli's face. The anguished look that suggested Eli might be in some sort of physical pain; the crybaby look that portrayed Eli's sincere surprise at the 3 consecutive incomplete passes he had just thrown, when in fact this happened all the god damn time.

But this was last year. This was before Eli proceeded to put up MVP-caliber numbers in the postseason to lead his 10-6 Giants to the Super Bowl. This was before Eli, like a seasoned veteran, calmly marched his team 83 yards downfield to score the winning touchdown against the invincible Patriots. Despite all this, I maintained my dislike for Eli and vowed to stay away from him in this year's draft. This past weekend, the Giants played the Seahawks. I immediately saw the Super Bowl champion that Eli had matured into. In the first two Giant possessions, Eli led two perfect drives that led to two touchdowns, going 5-5 for 96 yards and a touchdown, allowing Brandon Jacobs to run it in for the other. This time, there was no anguished look on Eli's face after another 3 and out, only smiles after throwing another touchdown pass.

God I hate Eli Manning...

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Two of AtA's Finest

Ever wonder what AtA writers talk about amongst themselves when they're not writing?


Brian Chen: Damn.

Adriel Carolino: ?

Brian Chen: Steelers are 4 point underdogs against Jags. Is Willie Parker still out?

Adriel Carolino: I dunno. They're underdogs? Really?

Brian Chen: Yea, I guess trends play a lot in these odds. They've been terrible lately.

Adriel Carolino: Aren't they undefeated?

Brian Chen: They lost to Philly.

Adriel Carolino: Ok so they're 3-1. Plus they barely lost to Philly...

Brian Chen: They scored a combined 16 points against Cleveland and Philly.

Adriel Carolino: Philly is good so I dunno about that one. But yea they sucked at Cleveland. It was a horrible weather day though. If Parker is up, I think they can win.

Brian Chen: What's so special about the Jags? Passing game is unimpressive. Running game is bad.

Adriel Carolino: Their defense is sick. How is their running game bad? It's good.

Brian Chen: ...How is their running game good?

Adriel Carolino: Taylor and Drew are good. They're legitimately good.

Brian Chen: Not this year...

Adriel Carolino: Not so far this year...

Brian Chen: But you can't just go by potential, you have to go by actual production.

Adriel Carolino: So you'd take Lee Evans over Plaxico Burress? I mean, Taylor and Drew both had over 100 yards against the Colts. That's not bad. Last game wasn't that great but they still got rushing production overall. But I still think Pitt is better.

Brian Chen: Yea. Hahaha I love ESPN anchors.

Adriel Carolino: You keep saying that...

Brian Chen: "If you don't think this is awesome, you need to take awesome lessons." They're seriosuly geniuses.

Adriel Carolino: That sounds like Barney Stinson. Dude I'm pretty excited about the Dodgers.

Brian Chen: Hahah, dude we just spent all class discussing the Angels and Dodgers. And whether or not they have a chance at the World Series this year.

Adriel Carolino: I don't think either have great chances.

Brian Chen: I got hated on because I was bashing on Angels' pitching.

Adriel Carolino: Dude their pitching is solid. Lackey and Santana is one of the top duos in the league.

Brian Chen: Meh, I'll still take Beckett and Dice-K in the postseason.

Adriel Carolino: I dunno, I think Dice-K is more hittable.

Brian Chen: Dude, Dice-K is UNhittable. He may walk a lot, but he is unhittable. His BAA is .211!

Adriel Carolino: Whatever, I still think the Cubs have the sickest pitching in the majors. I'm terrified of Cubs' pitching.

Brian Chen: I'm not buying Cubs' pitching. Dempster is overperforming. I'm just waiting for him to get lit up. Z is slumping. But Harden is filthy, though.

Adriel Carolino: Yea, Harden is a monster. And Wood can close. But I have a feeling they're gonna burn out like that Astro's team.

Brian Chen: Doesn't matter, World Series champs are gonna be Phillies. They're way too stacked. And J-Roll is too good.

Adriel Carolino: Is the Phillies' bullpen any good?

Brian Chen: I'm not sure who they are, but they've been getting the job done.

Adriel Carolino: Hahaha I had J-Roll before he was good. I was like, cool black shortstop. He was athletic and stole bases but couldn't do anything else. That was back in high school though. I think the Brewers are screwed because everything depends on CC and Braun.

Brian Chen: Dude they have Sheets. And Gallardo's starting Game 1 I think. He was solid last year. Plus their lineup is pretty stacked also.

Adriel Carolino: Meh, Kendall is past his prime. Prince is a stupid vegan. Counsell just sucks. And Hardy is barely decent.

Brian Chen: Ok when I say, "Brewer lineup is stacked," I'm clearly not referring to Jason Kendall.

Adriel Carolino: Wait, why is Sheets not listed on their rotation? DUDE SHEETS ISN'T PLAYING.

Brian Chen: Omg. You're right. A torn muscle near his pitching elbow. He's done, and so are the Brewers.

Adriel Carolino: Yea, I thought so.

Brian Chen: Plus, they're playing the Phillies. They have no chance. Cole Hamels is such a gangster.

Adriel Carolino: If the Brewers put CC on the mound for three straight games, they have a chance.

Brian Chen: Honestly, I think he can do it. I really think he can do it.

Adriel Carolino: Yea I know. I'm not kidding. That fat monster. He can go 11 straight games. Get them to the Series. Then chill. Then if they lose the first three, he'll pitch out the next four games. He's like a camel in the desert...

Brian Chen: Hahahha, he's so god damn huge. He's like Prince Fielder's father.

Adriel Carolino: No, Cecil Fielder is Prince Fielder's father.

Brian Chen: ...It was a joke, asshole.

Adriel Carolino: He's like Prince's twin, except blown up x2. So who do you think will go all the way?

Brian Chen: Phillies. Their offense is absolutely unstoppable. But Burrell's back is questionable right now. But even without Burrell they will still outslug any team in the playoffs right now.

Adriel Carolino: See, that's why I wanted a Phillies hat.

Brian Chen: Yea dude, you should get a Phillies hat. The Phillies are sick.


Will Adriel get a Phillies hat? Tune in next time...

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Will The Overrated Angels Be Exposed in the Playoffs?

Relax, the question was rhetorical.

How the Angels managed to win 100 games this year is beyond me. On paper, it's baffling how grossly the Angels pitching staff have overperformed. Six months ago, if you had told me that a mystery pitching staff would finish the season winning a combined 70 games while losing only 37, I would've guessed the Red Sox or Diamondback rotation. If you had told me that this 70-37 record would be the combined efforts of Ervin Santana, Joe Saunders, Jon Garland, Jered Weaver, and John Lackey, I would have called you a lying bastard and likely spat in your face.

Ervin Santana is 16-7 with a 3.49 ERA and a 1.12 WHIP. John Lackey is 12-5 with a 3.75 ERA and a 1.23 WHIP. If every game were played at Angel Stadium, Santana would be a Cy Young contender every year. Fortunately for the Angels, Santana has learned to pitch on the road this year. Lackey, on the other hand, is fresh off his Cy Young caliber season last year, and the success has carried over to this year. So fine, I'll give you Santana and Lackey. But the other three...let's talk about the other three...

In his first year as a full time starter, Joe Saunders is a startling 17-7 with a 3.41 ERA and a 1.21 WHIP. With just 103 K's in 198 IP, it's pretty clear that Saunders is not a power pitcher. However, with 58 walks over that same span, he doesn't appear to have fantastic control either. In fact, nothing on his stat sheet suggests that his 17-7 record is and will continue to be the norm, so I will go ahead and assume that Saunders is enjoying the lucky season that many pitchers experience. Only time will tell if Saunders will blossom into the next Jamie Moyer, or fade away with the likes of Brian Bannister.

Next on our list we have Jon Garland. Look up "average" in the dictionary and you'll likely find a picture of Jon Garland. Standing at an imposing 6 feet 6 inches, Garland cannot strike out a batter to save his life, and like Saunders, has unimpressive control. Garland's record stands at 14-8, but his laughable 4.90 ERA and 1.51 WHIP suggest that this is clearly an aberration. Don't be surprised when Garland gets lit up in the postseason.

Finally, we have Jered Weaver. After storming onto the scene in 2006 and establishing himself as the Angels ace, Weaver's numbers have been anything but dominant. His 11-10 record, 4.33 ERA, and 1.28 WHIP might be the least impressive on the rotation, and Weaver has shown no signs of rediscovering the magic he had back in 2006. Expect him to continue to be a nonfactor in the postseason.

It wouldn't be a legitimate discussion about overrated pitchers without mentioning Francisco Rodriguez, would it? The numbers don't lie. 2.24 ERA, 1.29 WHIP, 77 K's in 68.1 IP. Solid numbers, but not indicative of what is supposed to be baseball's premier closer. And while K-Rod has saved 62 games, he has also blown 7. The Phillies' Brad Lidge, on the other hand, has saved a perfect 41 out of 41. You tell me who you would rather have closing your games...

On offense, however, the Angels are much improved. Vlad Guerrero, easily having his worst season since his rookie year in 1997, is still putting up respectable numbers. And with run producers such as Mark Texeira, Torii Hunter, Garrett Anderson, Juan Rivera, and Gary Matthews Jr., any pitcher would find it difficult to navigate through the Angel lineup.

With a young, unproven pitching staff, the Angels' best chance at winning it all this year is to score more runs than the other team. And if the Halo's are lucky enough to make it to the World Series, they will likely face the powerhouse Phillies, in which case this feat will be near impossible. But then again, if the Angels' rotation is somehow able to pitch its way through Ryan Howard, Chase Utley, Pat Burrell, Jayson Werth, and Jimmy Rollins in a seven game series, I will gladly eat my words and wipe the saliva from your face.

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A Half of Horror

Pop Quizz, class. Who is a 5'6", a true freshman, and has more rushing yards than all of USC's offense combined? I have seen some pretty horrific sights, none of which are even comparable to what I am watching right now. Shredded, destroyed, dominated, embarrassed. These are words that USC football usually INFLICTS, not SUSTAINS. Pete, you said at halftime that you're going to figure this out. Personally, I can't think of how anyone is going to stop Quizz. I guess that's why you're the coach, coach.

Don't you hate pop quizzes?

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Not Yet, Notre Dame

In a game that featured a seemingly improved Notre Dame football squad (though it isn't terribly difficult to improve upon last year's catastrophic season), the Irish once again had their weaknesses mercilessly exposed by a superior Michigan State team. Entering the game with a promising 2-0 record, the Fighting Irish were on a mission to prove that they had returned to the class of college football elites. In consecutive weeks, Notre Dame had convincing victories over San Diego State and Michigan, though the legitimacy of both teams is strongly debatable. But hey, a two-game winning streak is a two-game winning streak, and the Irish were hoping to keep the ball rolling (or in the case of a football, wobbling unpredictably). The Spartans, however, with two dominant victories over Eastern Michigan and Florida Atlantic and a respectable effort against a solid California team, would by no means be a walkover...



Michigan State compensated for a deficient passing game with Heisman hopeful Javon Ringer in the backfield, who entered Saturday's game averaging 166 yards per game along with 9 touchdowns in just three games. Not surprisingly, the helpless Irish defense simply could not contain the explosive Ringer. Continuing to establish an argument that Heisman voters are going to have to start taking seriously, Ringer recorded a blistering 201 yards on the ground with two touchdowns.

With Jimmy Clausen at quarterback, it's a safe bet that the Irish are going to put up consistent passing numbers. Clausen did a decent job trying to keep the Irish in the game, going 24/41, racking up 242 passing yards, a touchdown and two interceptions. However, Clausen has never been the problem of Notre Dame's struggles. The question mark this year has been whether or not the Irish could sufficiently run the ball to take some of the pressure off Clausen in the pocket. And after the 23-7 loss to Michigan State on Saturday, the Irish are reluctant to reveal to the world that their running game is deplorable. Four different players combined for 16 carries, accumulating an embarrasssing total of 54 yards on the ground. These numbers don't even include Clausen's five quarterback scrambles that totaled negative 31 yards. Each time Clausen handed the ball of, you couldn't help but throw your hands into the air in disgust. Another tackle for a loss. Another down wasted on a promising drive...


The legendary and unwaveringly biased Lou Holtz predicted that Notre Dame would win at least eight games this year. After having their laughable ground game exposed last Saturday, it's doubtful whether the Irish will even come close to this mark. Looking over Notre Dame's remaining schedule, it's hard to imagine the Fighting Irish being a favorite in any of those games. At this point in the season, the best I can say about the Irish is that they might beat the Syracuse Orangemen on Novemeber 22. However, there is a good chance they will lose their remaining nine games and finish the season 2-10...

...Lou you better start talking to your boys.

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